"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." Sydney Harris

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The Gretchen Project, Episode 2

"Bon jewer." I have just sat through the most boring 18 minutes of my life. Episode 2 of the highly touted The Gretchen Project told me nothing that I couldn't have discovered from interviewing doctors myself 3 - 5 years ago (except that Dysport has recently been introduced as an alternative to Botox). Today's probe into the "newest advances in anti-aging/newest science revealed" involved a plea to make sure your doctor or surgeon is board certified, a tedious discussion of acne, and a brief dissertation on the use of fillers, when interviewee Dr. Michael Gold mentioned components of a liquid face lift that Dr. Shehla Ebrahim and her cohorts up here in Vancouver were advertising over a year ago.

Peppered among the inane questions and non-innovative answers were stimulating pink text visuals such as:

"Popping pimples can result in more pimples," (Wow! I learned something...)

"Men's products are similar to the women's except for the packaging," (Gosh!)

"Sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen. Wear Sunscreen!" (You don't say)

and delightfully entertaining typos such as:

"HYDROHALIC Acids is a type of filler used to plump up a depressed area of skin,"

"
HYDROHALIC Acids are naturally occurring substances...but we LOOSE them as we age"

and my favorite:

"Ask to see the Botox or Dysport VILE to make sure..."

During Dr. Gold's monologue on "the most exciting topic" he is covering this week, namely acne, the likable Gretchen appears to spot a fly and begins looking out at the camera crew, four times in total. She also giggles loudly in the most inappropriate places such as when Dr. Gold mentions that the collagen filler comes from pigs. "Pigs? Hehehehehehehehehe!!!!!"

But by far the worst part for me was when Dr. Gold mentions that Accutane is no longer available, at which point Gretchen throws out her arms, palms to the ceiling in acute desperation, then appears to go into mild shock. Not to worry, Dr. Gold reassures her. It is still available in generic form.

I can't wait to watch episode 3, which is about lasers and likely involves more shilling. Hopefully, the producers will have sent their blurb writer off for a few spelling lessons and installed fly screens in the studio.

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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lol. I love the hydrahalic acid. hysterical. I also like the bit where she looks around her like she's startled by something. Why didn't they edit that out? This whole series is so basic and really for people who know nothing about skin care yet have the money to pay for it. I don't think that makes sense either.

salvadordooley said...

Thanks for a darned good laugh, even though I haven't watched it. She looks pretty fake to me. The vile definitely needs checking...

Rosina at Middle Ageless said...

Hehe. Actually, Salvador, I never saw this Housewives show and Gretchen is new to me. I have to say I find her very sweet and engaging, if a little too much of the ingenue. I don't find her face looks altered but her hair is a little overdone for my liking. The producers of the show are very messed up on the demographics as Anon. pointed out. People who can afford to have various things done are usually well informed and are not learning anything from this series.

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